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Why is a diner on board a steam-boat like Easter Day?
Answer: Because it is a movable feast.
Why is a little man like a good book?
Answer: Because he is often looked over.
Why is a pig in a parlor like a house on fire?
Answer: Because the sooner it is put out the better.
What is the difference between a soldier and a bombshell?
Answer: One goes to war, the other goes to pieces.
Why is it dangerous to sleep in a train?
Answer: Because every train run over all the sleepers on the line.
Spell “enemy” in three letters?
Answer: F O E.
Which is the only way that a leopard can change his spots?
Answer: By going from one spot to another.
Why did Eve never fear the measles?
Answer: Because she’d Adam.
When is a tall man a little short?
Answer: When he hasn’t got quite enough cash.
What houses are the easiest to break into?
Answer: The houses of bald people; because their locks are few.
Why is a watch the most difficult thing to steal?
Answer: Because it must he taken off its guard.
Why is there never anybody at home in a convent?
Answer: Because it is an-uninhabited (a nun inhabited) place.
Why does a person who is not good-looking make a better carpenter than one who is?
Answer: Because he is a deal plainer.
What is the beet tree for preserving order?
Answer: The birch.
Why is shoemaking the easiest of trades?
Answer: Because the boots are always soled before they are made.
Games for All Occasions by Mary E. Blain